


Congratulations, You Breathe

by orphan_account



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, Cancer, Fluff, M/M, Nobody Dies, Terminal Illnesses
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-03-02
Updated: 2016-03-02
Packaged: 2018-05-24 06:43:52
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 5,744
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6144973
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>How rare and beautiful it is to even exist.</p><p>Or the one where Hinata Shouyou has cancer, and life is a shining flashlight that refuses to run out of battery.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Prologue

“Congratulations, it’s a boy” and “Congratulations, the chemo is working” are two very different congratulatory phrases. One means you’re finally exposed to the world, finally alive and breathing; the other means you’ve just barely managed to do so. Either way, a majority of your days are spent in a hospital that reeks of disinfectant and the patient’s puke from across the hall. I try to make the best of it.

 

When I was diagnosed with Stage Two Rhabdomyosarcoma, I was thirteen years old. Long words filled the clinic like a drowning tide but all my family needed to hear was “terminal cancer”. I can’t recall much from the first few weeks, but I do remember tears-too many of them. If I weren’t already sinking from the fear and the hospital visits, I’d have sunken further due to my mom’s crestfallen nature. I didn’t want to talk to scary, middle-aged men trying to help or the nurses with the night shifts. I wanted to talk to my two best friends. I wanted to play volleyball. I wanted to fly.

 

They shaved my head during radiation, and my mom cried again when my orange hair was spilled over the floor. I still thought I looked cool, and when I smiled at my mom to tell her it was okay, I hid the pain I felt in my stomach from the chemo. That same day, Kouji and Izumi came to visit. We walked around the hospital for hours, stealing pork buns and playing with the other patients on the children’s floor. It was fun, a day I will remember for as long as I live - no matter how short that may be. I’ll remember the look on Kouji’s face when a nurse caught him taking food, and how Izumi fell over from laughing so hard. I’ll remember playing volleyball for the first time in months with the children on the same floor, but most of all, I think I’ll never forget the way they described the infamous king of the court, the one I never got to play against.

 

I was able to fully return to school May of my last year in Junior High, meaning I hadn’t played volleyball in over eight months, nor done any schoolwork. Despite this, the school board allowed me to take the entrance exam for my local high school, Karasuno. If you were a junior high volleyball player from Miyagi, the expectation of an aspiring pro athlete was probably to go to a power school. However receiving the acceptance notice was among the top five happiest moments of my life. _I was finally going to be the little giant._


	2. Live Until You Can't

            The grin on his face was a little surprising, considering it was a rainy Monday morning and he had just biked to school.

 

            “Hi, I’m Hinata Shouyou. Karasuno’s future ace!” Determination laced his eyes, yet members of the team failed to suppress their chuckles.

 

            “Hello. I’m Sugawara Koushi, the official Karasuno setter. That’s Sawamura Daichi, the captain, and to my right is Azumane Asahi, our current ace. If you wanna be the new one, prove yourself.” His smile was not nearly as large as the excited first year in front of him, but it was the perfect image to describe kindness and Hinata knew he liked him already.

 

            Meeting Kageyama was interesting. Straight, black hair covered Tobio’s eyes, and long, slender fingers twirled a multi-coloured volleyball. The first thing that came out of his mouth was, “you’re short” so when Suga found them throwing punches in the two minute time span of their first encounter, he felt as if the only thing he could do was sigh.

 

            “It doesn’t matter that I’m short - no matter what stands in my way, I’ll be able to get over it. I don’t care if it’s a six-foot wall or a sixty-foot one; I’ll fly!”

 

            As Hinata runs and receives, determined to be worthy of Kageyama’s toss, Tobio doesn’t mention the way his heart clenches looking into honey coloured eyes. It scares him a little, the way he wants to continue staring at them.

 

            On the following Saturday, they have a practice match against the captain and two other (snarky) first years. Shouyou seems more tired than he had when they met. He’s still happy and excited, but his eyes aren’t as illuminated. Kageyama wants to fix it.

 

            The toss flies in the air, too quick for anyone to react. Tobio thinks Shouyou is the personification of joy when he’s soaring through the air and hitting the ball. When it hits the ground, his feet do as well. Then, he is loud cheers and jumping and Kageyama is thinking he could get used to it.

 

            Unfortunately, because he is certain that the universe spins to see him live in permanent misfortune, Hinata pukes right by his shoes. Kageyama wants to yell at him, punch him the way any teenager would when their peer does something embarrassing. He can’t bring himself to do it when Shouyou’s looking up with flushed cheeks, teary eyes and a frown that says _I_ _’_ _m sorry_.

 

            He’s exasperated, more tired than his body can handle and soon his hands are pushing against his shaved head, cringing in pain and Daichi’s calling over Takeda. The team is silent, internally wondering what their next move should be, but this isn’t volleyball-life doesn’t work through organized plays. It’s strange and unexpected, which is why they stop thinking and try to comfort Hinata instead.

 

            His mom arrives fifteen minutes after the pain had begun. If she had known she was going to pick up her son wincing in pain rather than jumping for joy, she would have mentally prepared herself more.

 

            “Sho, what’s going on?” Frantic glares and trembling hands held the son they’d spent so long embracing.

 

            Daichi spoke for him instead, “Hi Hinata-san. Nobody knows. He threw up by Kageyama’s shoes nearly twenty minutes ago and has been holding his head in pain since.”

 

            “It must be the new medicine, ever since he started chemo they’ve been testing out differen-”

 

            “Mom!”

 

            “Yes honey? I was just explaining that it must be your new…oh. The team doesn’t know yet? I told you to put it on the team application.”

 

            “Know what?” Daichi’s puzzled look was enough to make Hinata-san feel awkward enough. Before Shouyou’s first day of school, his mother and him agreed to letting the volleyball team know of his cancer, treatment, medication, and everything in between. It was never going to be easy in the first place; Shouyou knew what was coming. With every informed person close to the Hinata family came tears, lots of them. He never wanted that. He wanted grins that reached eyes and hearts clenching of pride, watching the 5’4 boy jump as high as he could. He couldn’t think of a reason as to why keeping cancer a secret could be detrimental to a close-knit high school volleyball team.

 

            “I’ll wait in the parking lot Sho. You seem to have a lot of explaining to do.”

 

            “Care to explain Hinata?” Sugawara looked paler than usual, and Hinata knew he had caught on by the way his fingers trembled inside his volleyball jacket. Soon the pain had died down and he stood in front of a curious team, some denser _(cough, Kageyama)_ than others.

 

            “I have cancer. Stage two Rhabdomyosarcoma. I got it when I was thirteen, hospitalized my whole fourteenth year, and was finally put back in school in May. They originally said I had five to seven months to live, tops.” He paused to recollect the breath he seemed to lose from speaking.

 

“I’m still here now though, and I’m still fighting. I don’t want this to change anything, all right? Just because I throw up all the time and my hair won’t grow back until I’m off medication it doesn’t mean anything about me as an athlete-I still want to be the best volleyball player as much as any of you, and I will be. Don’t let this define me. I’m strong, and maybe I’m short but I can fly!” There were galaxies in his eyes, Kageyama was sure of it.

 

            “Thank you for telling us, Hinata. We agree. If anything, this will make us stronger. You have all of us now, you don’t have to fly alone.” Suga was grinning, the kind that reached his eyes and Hinata had to double take to register his reaction. Maybe there was sadness hidden behind the smile, but Hinata was taking what he could get.

 

            Then there were hugs, lots of them. It was odd to see such a response. Maybe it’s because they weren’t close enough yet, however Hinata couldn’t bring himself to think that had been the reason. He knew they were different. The sixteen people that sat in front of him were peculiar; they were a little clumsy and disorganized, yet they almost played like a power school. They bickered and threw volleyballs at each other, however as they watched the small first year talk about his biggest burden, they looked like a family.

 

            They walked out of the gymnasium divided. Tsukishima and Yamaguchi, Daichi and Sugawara, then Tanaka, Noya and Asahi. Narita, Ennoshita, Kinoshita were responsible for clean up, with Kiyoko and Yachi following. The new-formed duo walked in silence with Takeda and Ukai closing the doors. Their bickering began when they were alone, and the rest of the team thanks Kageyama Tobio for being such an irritable person this one time; Hinata had no idea of the surprises that were being planned by the people around him.

 

            “I’m thinking wigs-a bunch of them. Cool ones; I don’t want him to think we’re trying to mess with him, you know?” Tanaka exclaimed. Any passing person would’ve thought he had won gold at the Olympics with the prideful look he held.

 

            “Hell yeah! Let’s go to the store right now!” A flash of black and blonde hair flew past Asahi’s calm ( _not for much longer_ ) eyes, and the third year didn’t even have time to sigh as he began sprinting towards his friend.

 

            On the road opposite to theirs, quiet words were exchanged between Tadashi and Kei.

 

            “Maybe we could get him some of the new good CDs that are out.”

 

            “Good idea, Tsuki.” Tadashi didn’t mention the way he thought Kei was only buying Hinata a gift he could share with him. Instead, he brushed shoulders with him as they made their way to the music shop ten minutes away.

 

            Yachi’s fingers tapped away at her new cellphone (courtesy of her mother), and brightly grinned at the text she had just received.

 

            “Kiyoko! Yamaguchi and Tsukishima are buying Hinata CDs. Maybe we should get him a CD player to go with it?”

 

            “That sounds like a great idea Yachi, but isn’t that a little expensive?”

 

            “No, I can definitely pay for most of it! I want to show Hinata that he’s a part of our team forever, and that it means more than just someone who spikes the ball to give us points!” The look in her eyes was enough to convince Shimizu.

 

            They ended up running into Ennoshita, Kinoshita, and Narita at the plaza while they pitching in for a cool volleyball sweater. Despite the second years barely being able to speak to Hinata, the longing to make him happy to be on the team was heavy in their hearts.

 

            Daichi and Sugawara sat on the curb outside of Ukai’s convenience store, which had given them free volleyball decorated treats in an assorted basket to give Hinata from Takeda, himself, the captain and his official setter.

 

            The raven-haired boy with a menacing glare was not in Ukai’s convenience store, nor was he at the shopping plaza. His bony knees were pressed against his heaving chest, back pressed against the cold locker behind him. Kageyama was familiar with death and extreme sicknesses. Not to the point that it crippled his life and prevented him from day to day activities, but it swarmed the back of his mind like hornets. _When you grow up with an uncle, a grandmother, and a father all either dead or hospitalized from terminal illness, medical terms are nothing but a depressing poem. A new volleyball partner having Rhabdomyosarcoma was no different._ Despite his thoughts, he couldn’t help the fear that burrowed a hole in his chest. _What would happen if we became close? Anyone who would be spending that much time together is bound to. What would happen if we made it all the way to nationals, and something happened? What then?_

 

           When the smaller athlete walked into the locker room in search of his jacket, his eyes held no look of anger the way Kageyama’s had. Instead, a frown made his cheeks look a little chubbier and the stare was one of concern.

 

           “Kageyama? Are you okay? What happened?” Frantic and quick to react; Tobio thought Hinata seemed the same alone as he did around a lot of people.

 

           “Yes, dumbass. I’m fine. Here’s your jacket.”

 

           “Are you sure? You can talk to me you know! We’re partners now! I’m here for you.” _It should be the other way around._

 

           “...I’ve only just met you, yet I’m scared for you. You seem so determined and so passionate about this, as much as me. What would happen if you never get the chance to do what you want most?”

 

           “I will. I-it’s scary, I know. Living like Russian roulette, you never know when you something the cancer can come back stronger, or I can collapse, or the medication can make me react horribly.” He pauses for a moment to direct his gaze away from Kageyama.

 

           “But that goes for everyone. You don’t need to have cancer to know anything could happen. Car accidents, getting mugged, explosions. I think everyone has a fair chance at life, which gives us all the more reason to make the most of it. I might get sicker, but I also might get better. So I’m gonna use the time I-we have, to be the best volleyball player I can be because I really think that’s why the universe made me better in the first place.” The locker room roof suddenly seems more interesting than the younger setter’s face.

 

           “You’re right. I hope our chance is fair enough. I hope we make the most of it, and that you get better-the best you’ve ever been. You’re a dumbass, but you don’t deserve this shit.” Silence.

 

           “Nobody does.”

 

           In that moment, Kageyama wants to hug him, but he puts that note at the back of his mind for a different time.

 

           “Do you want to come over Kageyama?” It’s a little farfetched, but Hinata’s mom is waiting in the car with and at home there’s an extra plate of pork curry and egg with nobody to eat it.

 

           “Eh? Uh, y-sure, if it's okay with your family.” He replies. In the dimly lit room, Kageyama’s sure the rosy tint on his cheeks isn’t visible, but Hinata just chooses not to say anything. _Some memories are best left unsaid, tucked in the back of our minds for when we need to feel extra happiness._

 

           They walk out of the locker room nearly stuck together, with the back of their hands occasionally sweeping together.

 

           When Kageyama, Shouyou, and his mother arrive at the Hinata household, the nervous gaze behind Tobio’s eyes could be mistaken as a murderous one. It’s no surprise when Shouyou’s younger sister Natsu _does_ mistake it as intended malice.

 

           “Nii-chan! Mommy! And who are you? You’re scary looking.” She’s tugging at his hand in attempt to make him crouch. He regrets his decision to do so, as now he’s in front of the door, with his cheeks being pinched and a giggling Hinata behind them.

  
           “Kageyama Tobio.” His muffled attempt at introducing himself is suddenly quite funny to Shouyou’s mom as well, for all she does is ruffle Natsu’s hair and swiftly unlock the door.

 

           “There’s pork curry and egg in the kitchen if you’d like some, Tobio. I hope that's fine.” Hinata-san smiles warmly and he smiles back. He isn’t aware of the ginger boy’s heart clenching as he watches from his peripheral view.

 

           “It's more than fine, thank you so much.”

 

           The three children sit in the cozy-looking dining room. It would have been two, however Natsu is a persistent five-year old and it is an apparent necessity for her to instigate Shouyou’s friends. By instigate, she means see how they react to her styling their hair.

 

           Shouyou expected annoyed grumbles and awkward retorts, not soft eyes and tender words. Watching Kageyama gently hand over hair clips to his baby sister put a feeling in his chest he didn’t know was possible after only knowing a person for three days.

 

           Hinata’s room shared an abundance of similarities to Kageyama’s, with volleyball posters taped to the wall, a messy desk, and dirty clothes evidently shoved behind his bed. There was a noticeable difference though. Not the pictures, or the bedsheets, not even the fact that Shouyou’s room was green in contrast to Kageyama’s dark blue. It was the smell-a pungent odour of disinfectant and chemicals. The more he stood inside the more he noticed it, also taking note of the various bottles of both liquid and solid medication lined up on the crook of his windowsill.

 

           Hinata knew Kageyama wanted to comment on the scent. It was unwanted and it smelt like the opposite of home, but Kageyama just sat on the corner of his bed, looking at the pictures held up by strings. He decided that his favourite picture was on of Shouyou in a nearby park; his hair was flowing in the wind and his small fingers were intertwined, ready to bump the volleyball. Tobio decided that an orange sunset was the picture’s natural lighting, as it seemed to make the boy’s beautiful orange hair seem brighter than the other images.

 

           “I’m really excited for your hair to grow back.” He mumbled. It was more of an inner thought, but the bed dipped and now they were sitting cross-legged in front of each other, knees touching.

 

           “Me too.”

 

           “Your hair really fit your personality you know?”

 

           “What do you mean?” Hinata was smiling, looking at the same picture Kageyama was referring to.

 

           “It was so different and it really stood out, just like you. Fit you really well.” Tobio was nearly whispering.

 

           “When it grows back, maybe Natsu can give both of us cool hairstyles.” Kageyama hums in agreement. He likes this. He’s not used to this treatment, it’s weird and surprising, but it’s pleasant. He wants to get used to it, but he doesn’t know if he can.

           

            The following morning isn’t meant to make Kageyama feel like a piece of shit, but it does. Hinata and the setter sprint their way to the gym, expecting nothing more than a laughing Suga, but they open the door and there’s so much _love_. Every member of the team-coaches and managers included, have boxes wrapped terribly in 100 yen wrapping paper and bows that barely manage to stay on. They all wear a smile on their face that says _welcome_ and then Hinata is jumping around with teary eyes. Kageyama wants to cry too.

 

          The previous night, Kageyama went home with a full heart after spending time with Hinata. One of his first friends happened to be a hyperactive volleyball and meat bun enthusiast, how much better could it get?

 

          He walked into his house looking content but his mother didn’t want to seem surprised, instead she gave him a hug and asked about his day. When he fell asleep, his room smelt like what he thought was normal. The walls were navy instead of green and he had fewer pictures on the wall. He thought of wide eyes that matched its smile and someone who deserved so much happiness and fortune but is only beginning to receive it now. He’s thankful it’s beginning at all.

 

          It was lovely thoughts, really. The dream was nice as well. But he felt the urge to slap everyone on the team for not informing him of their plans to surprise Shouyou. What did the team think? Just talking to the boy _clearly_ is not enough to show that he is welcome to the team; that he is capable of doing everything he wishes to do.

 

          Kageyama does what he does best, and walks to the bleachers to sit down and observe from afar.

 

          “Gwaaa! Guys, why are you doing this? It’s so nice!” Hinata stands in front of the team bouncing on his heels. Kageyama’s heart clenches. Due to the early arrival and there being a spare fifteen minutes before practice, they all sat in a circle (excluding one grumpy setter), each taking turns to give Hinata their gifts.

 

           The first present had Hinata, Tanaka, Noya, and even Asahi in a fit of laughter. Laid out neatly in front of him were two wigs; one dark brown one, and one neon pink. Before Hinata could even squeak out a thank you the entire team knew which one Tanaka would wear. He _does_ have no shame after all (when three of his classmates are judging him for wearing a “ridiculous” wig, he simply grins because _it_ _’_ _s for Hinata, dammit_ ).

 

           Second came a multi-sleeve case of CDs from a smiling Yamaguchi and a pensive Tsukishima. Despite this, he couldn’t help but feel a little fond when Hinata was gushing over artists he’s never heard of but Tsuki really enjoyed listening to.

 

           Next came the CD player, which resulted in a large gasp and an even larger hug. Yachi and Shimizu were laughing in endearment, pinching his cheeks and watching him show everyone, even though they had already known of the gift before it was given. 

 

           When he received both the volleyball sweater and the volleyball treats, one would have thought Hinata was a boy on Christmas morning. The treats didn’t last long, and there were a few crumbs on the new sweater, however there were many “thank you’s” along the way.

 

           The team began practice with feeling light and successful in the attempts to make Hinata feel at home. With every passing minute, he stayed near Kageyama. Confusion was evident on his “constipated” face but Shouyou ignored the looks, smiling at the taller boy every chance he received.

 

           Tobio had enough of the treatment by lunch.

 

           “Look, I get it if you’re hanging out with me because you feel bad that I eat alone or something, but you really don’t have to.” Kageyama grumbled, playing with his hands as they refused to touch his food.

 

           “What? I thought we were friends.” Hinata stared up at him with sadness and _dear god_ that’s the last thing he wanted.

 

           “No-yes, we are. I just thought you wouldn’t think so because I didn’t get you a gift.” Hinata had the audacity to laugh at the remark.

 

           “Don’t be silly, bakayama! You’re my friend because you’re awesome. Your sets are like _bwaaa_ and _gwoosh._  And even though your face is scary it’s also pretty nice when Natsu’s talking to you. Plus you don’t judge me or pity me because of my sickness - I’d still be your friend whether you gave me a puppy or absolutely nothing.” Hinata finished with a huff, intensely glaring into Kageyama’s eyes. They were basically having a staring contest, but his deep pink blush made Hinata gaze at his cheeks. _Cute._

 

           “Y-you dumbass. Don’t go saying things like that.” Tobio jabbed his side, clearly showing his affection for the middle blocker. Laughing, they finished their food, and chose not to speak about the fluttery feeling lingering at the pit of their stomachs.

 

           Time passed and the days seem to end much quicker, the biting cold crept up on them but it still felt warm. Maybe it was the fire in his eyes or the way a simple touch to Tobio’s shoulder could make stagger his breath, he wasn’t sure. It was nearly an addiction. He noticed miniscule things about fierce feelings. Big hands longed to cup soft cheeks, to hold the small of his back, memorize curves of his body and the way seeing the colour orange would never be the same.

 

            It is early December when they have their second practice match against Karasuno’s biggest rival, Nekoma. Hinata can’t help his friendly persona and instantly befriended a majority of the team at the first practice match. Now they’re all huddled in a circle talking to Hinata and Kageyama can’t help the sour taste in his throat or the way his eyebrows automatically furrow watching Kuroo ruffle the older boy’s hair.

 

            The feeling is gone when Shouyou rushes over to Tobio ten minutes before the game begins so they could stretch together. A new feeling arises when he lightly taps Kageyama’s shoulder. He feels like a young child’s frozen yogurt cup, his happiness being a nice flavour that is ruined by unwanted toppings. He nearly snorts at the thought.

 

            “Kag-eyama I-I feel funny.” His eyes were droopy, giving Kageyama all the more reason to begin panicking.

 

            “Hinata. Keep your eyes open. I’m going to tell Coach and Sensei. Do you want water?” A water bottle was placed in slightly trembling hands before Hinata could respond.

 

            “Coach Ukai. Sensei. Hinata’s having trouble, I think-”

 

            “Hinata!” A hysterical cry came from behind him and Tobio’s heart dropped to his feet. Crouching in front of a passed out boy stood a confused one-Kenma had never dealt with one of these episodes. Neither had any of Karasuno, really, which is why everyone broke out in a fit of panic while Takeda called the paramedics.

 

            _It can_ _’_ _t happen like this._

 _He was okay, he is okay, and he will be okay_. _We still have a match to play, that dumbass can_ _’_ _t get worse-he can_ _’_ _t be at his worst. What if he_ _’_ _s at his worst?_ Kageyama stood still and felt as if time did the same. He watched people around him begin packing their things, eager to follow the paramedics. When Suga was snapping his fingers in front of his eyes and pulling his arm to begin rushing, Kageyama began walking. When Daichi was doing a headcount and reassuring scared teammates, Kageyama sat still. When they arrived at the hospital and Kageyama saw Shouyou asleep in a place that is probably a second home, he wanted to scream, cry, or do anything that would make him feel something more than petrified. He didn’t know if he could.

 

            Hinata’s eyes fluttered open to see a dimly lit hospital room, and when he turned his pounding head to look at the digital clock, it read 1:09am. It smelt like hand sanitizer and even though his room was the same, he wanted to cry in frustration. _All of that time; all of the medicine and the effort channeled into getting better_ _…_ _for this? What was it all for? I can_ _’_ _t seem to remember._

 

            He pressed the button for a nurse and when she shuffled in, sixteen others did as well. There had to be some sort of room capacity, but the nurse couldn’t be bothered to make them leave when Hinata started sobbing.

 

            “You all stayed? I can’t believe…” He choked out, rubbing his eyes with pale fingers, and Kageyama wanted to kiss him.

 

            “Of course, dumbass. I-we were all worried out of our minds. Even Tsukishima got into the bus before me.” Kageyama smirked at Tsukishima, who let out a _tch_ from the corner of the room. Not a hint of malice was laced in the sound, and Hinata smiled. Bright and beautiful, the way people knew it to be.

 

            “Okay, Hinata Shouyou. My name is Dr.Nariko. Do you want everyone in the room to stay while I break down the basic reason behind your incident?” She continued when he nodded furiously.

 

            “So the medicine we had you on; the Bisphosphonates, not the Fentanyl, wasn’t responding well to the lingering affects of the XRT. We had originally thought that it would balance well with the Fentanyl, however we didn’t take into consideration the factors of post-therapy side effects. Because of this, it made you pass out, also the heavy exertion of volleyball over the course of the months has probably contributed to the unconsciousness as well. In order to fix this, we’re going to have you come in for a couple overnight hospitalizations in the upcoming weekends, in which we can test a couple options and find what works best in correlation with everything else.” Dr.Nariko finished with a smile. Nobody other than Shouyou and his mother understood what was going on, but they all watched with intensity anyway.

 

            “So no new tumours or spreading of anything?” Asked a curious Daichi.

 

            “No new tumours. In fact, you’re actually doing really well, Hinata. After we find the right medication for you, you’ll have hit the mark for off-treatment and the hospital will have a little celebration! You can expect your hair to grow back soon, too.” The exact opposite of what they were anticipating was happening: relief, recovery, celebration, happiness. Words you’d think wouldn’t come out of a supposed terminally ill patient.

 

_I_ _did it._

 

            Noises of joy and relief followed. The air was light and all tension flooded out, and for the first time in Hinata’s life being in a hospital room wasn’t so bad. Things got even better when they shuffled out to give Hinata some space but Kageyama stayed.

 

            For a while they don’t say anything, enjoying the silence as they gather warmth from each other in the late hours of the night. Shouyou’s mouth closes as soon as it opens when he hears a sniffle coming from the presence beside him. His lips formed a frown after whipping his head toward the younger boy, seeing his elbows on his knees and his face in his hands.

 

            “I’m just really glad your okay, Shouyou.” _Shouyou._

 

            “Come here.” Those were the last words of the night, as lips to skin and lips to lips filled the rest of the silence.

 

_One to the tip of your nose, because it_ _’_ _s a lovely shade of pink in contrast to the fairness of your cheeks. One to the side of your neck, because it_ _’_ _s soft and it reminds me of vanilla cream. Three to your chest, because I watched it move up and down when we had first raced and you had won, when I won after that, and the third when you lay asleep in this bed. One to your knuckles, because they work so hard to make teammates happy and to make Natsu happy and to hold mine when they_ _’_ _re shaking, or at least to do so in the future. One last kiss to your lips, because they pull me in the strongest, because they look beautiful, mauve and plump, because I was scared I would never get the chance to._

 

            The first snow of December falls the next morning, and they exit the hospital as one. A recluse would say that the people Hinata loves most in his life surround him like weeds; Hinata decides that they are flowers.

 

            “Congratulations on you and Kageyama, Hinata!” Suga’s eyes crinkle at the edges and it reminds Hinata of summertime. He grins, and then he’s looking at his _boyfriend_ and thinking that there wasn’t a better congratulatory statement than that. Childbirth was nice, so was off-treatment day. Yet when he looks into midnight blue eyes that shine despite their glare, he knows having the privilege to stare at them all day is the biggest blessing of all.

 

            December 22nd, also known as Kageyama Tobio’s birthday, was spent in the hospital. The white lights on the ceiling weren’t exactly fairy lights, and perhaps the IV wasn’t a water balloon ready to be thrown, but it was a birthday full of love. Child patients who shared a floor with the once hospitalized Hinata came running over to their room and joined in on cake and music. People (nurses included) danced and ate, and for once the hospital was not overflowing with sadness and disease, rather blooming with joy and people who were happy to get the chance to at least live this day through.

           

            The day ends outside of the hospital, at 10:40pm under a snow-covered tree in the backyard of Hinata’s house. It’s grown through the fence like a beautiful accident. Kageyama sees it and thinks, relating the tree to Hinata’s life and the way nothing ever really happens the way it should, but the way that isn't always a problem. 

 

            “Isn’t it weird how someone could be having a horrible day right now?” Hinata asks, shifting his gaze from the flakes that fall from a wobbling branch to look at his bundled up boyfriend. Kageyama tilts his head and Hinata continues.

 

            “Think about it. There are seven _billion_ people in the world. People are crying their eyes out right now, or they could be laughing the hardest they have ever laughed. Someone probably just won a lottery or maybe someone lost their job. I could’ve been the sickest I’ve ever been tonight, but instead I’m beside someone I never thought I’d meet and I think I really like him.” He breathes it out like a whisper, but it rings in Kageyama’s ears like a declaration to the world. When Kageyama says it back, it’s a song in the air and he wants to dance to it.

 

            They say that life is a winking light in the darkness. Maybe we remember moments rather than days. Sometimes those moments are the embodiments of melancholy, however Hinata believes if you look long enough, if you keep your head above the water, and you smack your favourite dumbass on the head hard enough, you’ll find the greatest moments of contentment. He thinks his favourite moment is six months after Kageyama’s birthday, when they are standing on the court, fifteen seconds after the duo scored the winning point at the Spring Cup. The world moves around them but Kageyama only knows of the boy that moves to give him a kiss in front of the crowd. Hands finally run their fingers through a head of _fluffy, full, bright and orange hair_ and Kageyama knows it’s meant to be like this, so he takes it with everything he’s got.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so much for reading! I hope you enjoyed it ^_^ I'm putting a disclaimer here to mention that I have no further knowledge of cancer past internet research, so if anybody who is a little more familiar on the topic would like to point out any mistakes, that would be greatly appreciated :) feel free to leave any other comments or constructive criticism no matter how small it is! reading them is my absolute favorite part of posting my work on ao3 :)  
> I hope you have a lovely day/night friends! :3 <3


End file.
